Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize