it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
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