Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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