margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
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