last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
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