She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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