so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Randomize
