Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize
