What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
