ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
