You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
