i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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