u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
