ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
