oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
