i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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