theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
