So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
