I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I can't put those talents on a resume
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
