I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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