Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I just gift wrapped bread.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
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