And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
