i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
