I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
do herpes really smell.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
