omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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