Have you finally orgasmed yet?
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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