I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
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