dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Randomize
