Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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