if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
