You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
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