I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Randomize
