come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
