So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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