You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
