Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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