Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
