My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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