i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Randomize
