Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Randomize
