i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
