Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Randomize
