Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
