you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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