1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
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