Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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