Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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