i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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