I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
