I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize