now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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