kristin has been a bad kristin
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
you told grandpa to call you daddy
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I need to wash the frat house off of me
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
